I'm going crazy! That familiar urge to just get up and go has settled in again. The one where I'll just walk around the house looking for something that doesn't exist, staring at the walls. The one that makes me fear going outside or traveling because deep down I know that if I start there will be that temptation to just keep going. I usually try to distract myself with creativity when I get this way, hence the blog post and the quite probable blog posts succeeding this one :P
Just had to skip out for a second and write a confession to my parents...a cowardly confession since I posted it somewhere they'll probably never read it. On the other hand it really settled that flighty feeling that was consuming my insides.
On the left hand I think I prefer that feeling to this new low...
Man that sounds depressing, haha...ewww...
Eh, whatever, at the end of the day there are only two people who have to approve of the way I've lived my life. Myself and God.
And I'm going to be happy if it kills me. Which it just might if I'm lucky :P
And I'm convinced God gave me life so that I could be happy and makes others happy. I still plan to serve with my life. It's all I really want to do. It's what'll make me happy. I just don't want to waste half of my life in school to do it.
I'll serve my way and be happy.
End of story.
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